you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
