My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize