he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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