i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
