I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
