So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
