It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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