I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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