"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
zippers are such a cool invention
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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