Plan B is the new Plan A
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Who died my cat blue again?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize