AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
