I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize