These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
And then my night got REAL pukey
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
