Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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