It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
well most of my day revolves around power hour
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
