i just google imaged poop.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
