We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
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