is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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