Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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