we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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