Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Terrible idea I love it
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
