I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
