so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
