It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
