yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
