yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
