Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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