My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
never play flip cup with pint glasses
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
as a side note pls kill me
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
