we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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