he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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