no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Randomize
