I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize