So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
