He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
