1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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