I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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