I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize