you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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