Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
