I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
