very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Randomize
