my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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