She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
only you would photoshop your dick
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Randomize