Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize