I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
