I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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