i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
