Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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