90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
