I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
