Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
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