Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
