when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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